I considered using a plant metaphor
but I kill most plants
I don’t know anything about
growing leafy things
only recent experience in
how to keep something alive
but I imagine a tiny sprout
protruding from the ground
I clearly see this sprout
I look around
– no one else notices –
I wonder what kind of plant it’s going to be
this little shoot
I start to wish it will become
a wish-fulfilling tree
I know such trees exist, have existed
in this world, in other worlds
and though rare, difficult to find,
I know such saplings exist!
I cannot ask for anyone’s help,
because even if this plantlet
is to become this rare tree,
no one will identify it correctly —
it would be discarded! —
and I just have this really strong
feeling in my gut
that I have come across the growing sprout
of a wish-fulfilling tree!
I’m keen to protect it, and help it grow
but I’m really really good
at killing all things green –
they don’t need help, it’s cyclical –
and I really feel like I can’t talk
about this rare treasure
with anyone I’ve met,
because, let’s be real,
people are, like, really good
at murdering dreams
so I just wish to myself,
(pray)
please, please may I have found
a wish-fulfilling tree
please, please, help me nurture it
and please help me not kill it
I know I’m so so so good at killing
familiar with the action, as I’ve been
please, don’t let me become
attached to the idea of the tree
that somehow wish-fulfilment will grant me
happiness – I know it won’t!
I know it is my virtue – but still!
Think of all the good I could do,
granting all those wishes,
with wisdom of course
I would never abuse my power
I act with self-lessness
and still, I confess
I do not have even the wisdom to know
what kind of sprout I have found
or if I have found
anything at all
for I’m the only one who sees
this plant, so small
perhaps it is just a shadow
of desire that grows in the dirt
How can I know?
The Halfwit Writer 