Categories
Buddhism Dreams Poetry

osprey

      I see     
              an osprey kick a gull in the head
        & catch a fish
                          this morning

                         emerge            compassion
                  for   attachment
                              killing
                      though   thought  rare sight
                                —  such common poison!

emptiness
          a play of light
                        arises before me
                                  due to mind

it’s only mind

      I must endure
                just one more day  —
    time to love & time to play 

      I must endure     this suffering
              for I have caused it
                    that I see

       these imprints strong
                self-grasping   me

       like clouds appear
              in a summer sky
      seeming so blue
                          in my sense’s eye
        and clouds so white
              appear to dance
              changing shape
              and circumstance
        with one another
                scenes create
        a turkey vulture roosts
                while whales tempt fate
                to swim so high
                        up in the sky
                    it almost makes me
                                  question why
                    I feel that I can wait
                        to truly escape
                this earthly suffering
                finding no one here
        who is happier than me

                finding no couple who’s truly at peace
            seeing no being that moves with ease

           observing not one who can work together
        without hatred, attachment, greed

     should I give up?     — No!

                 I’ll change my aspiration instead

I aspire to be truly happy, a    pure   example

     & although I wish for another by my side
        one who would face the changing tide,
                      I know in another I cannot seek
                any joy or peace to be —
                            for it all must come from me

     & although I strive to give & give
                      in humanness, I can’t let go
        of my own unfulfilled hunny-do list —
            this deluded partner, lazy, low —
            by whose esteem I now accomplish
            many of my deeds  — instead of
                saving for me,   a pure aspiration
            —  enlightenment for all,   equally

     & although a man in measure
    may grant me earthly pleasure
            there’s not a time I can recall
      unmixed with poison from the fall

      an apple sweet, an apple tart
            both eventually rot & fall apart
            never singular, & still
              each wish we’d like it to fulfill

      the flavourful & wellness start
      healthy gut, balanced,    body art

this world is crazy, bizarre, insane —
                & if I believe I can lay the blame
                                with anyone else,
                      I’ve already failed

so instead I vow to see, in each & every irony
    a new teaching, a blessing,       gift
        in each disturbance,     every rift

a chance to see things appear to fall apart
                    never once one thing
                                      except in name
          and with delusions I lay all blame

self-cherishing, self-grasped —
                              in dependence, same

I am so tired of samsara’s games
                              I quit

on to Enlightenment, charging forth
                      with Dharma’s wealth

   I’m collecting merit for good health 

for long, long years in which to help
              all beings do the same

   to happiness, I now lay claim

watching the gulls upon the bend
          leaves me with these words to send
                                                        to you

thank you for your time,
          and love,    and coming to this place
        may your mind be ever blessed
                        with peace & happiness
                               

Categories
Buddhism Philosophy Poetry

determination

I am only a witness,
        transparent eye
a non judgemental mirror —
          or at least a mirror who keeps
          her judgments to herself

I am the nursery rhyme before it’s written,
        the angel before the fall
        the dream before the nightmare
        the ring before the call

I hear the future coming,
          still feel the distant past,
  see outcomes from our actions
              that for years & years will last

I weep for sad beginnings
            I laugh at mad hellos
  see insanity all around us
        and suffering only grow

I am ready to escape this
        ready to depart
        ejecting all attachment
        burning all my art

I have not one creation
          of which I am proud
  except those that come from virtue,
              those soundless,
              those I’ve vowed

I sow these seeds in silence
          for my words have caused much pain
          all contaminated actions
               seemingly in vain
          (* focus on intention *)

I hear the whistle blow,
          a hundred miles from home
  smell the fields of mountain thyme
            growing round the purple heather
  and still cannot decide
                if to stay or go

                        until I walk the streets
                see the suffering
                hear the cries
                smell the stink
                feel the terror
                taste the drink

then it all comes rushing back,
          each and every pleasure,
                    that I’ve had it all before
      —     it’s time to think!
                   I cannot do this anymore!
I won’t!

So with reliance, offering, requesting,
            my life I do lay down
                  only for something better
            more meaningful, profound

      with diligent, stable practice
              (which, finally, I’ve found)
              and compassionate, loving heart
              I fall upon the Bodhisattva’s ground

I bow before the new moon,
          and rising with the sun
  try to take things lightly,
  because all is mind and none is one

Categories
Buddhism Good Fortune Poetry

once free

Do you know what it is
to be without

fear, sorrow,
deluded doubt?

Do you know what it is
to be truly free

from anger, hatred,
and misery?

Do you know what it is
to go within

where all is pure,
without sin?

Do you know what it is
to exist in peace

where all causes for unhappiness
have ceased?

Do you know what it is
to know your mind

limitless potential,
joyful, kind?

I have finally found
such instructions pure
as my name imputed,
an unmistaken cure

now to follow
this joyful path
it alone is happy,
clear, unmatched

who will join me?
may it be all
with equanimity, love,
we shall heed the call

and finally discover
Enlightenment unbound
dreamlike true existence,
once unknown, now found

Categories
Buddhism Dreams Philosophy Poetry

the speed of love

in grade six,
     we were asked to
                define love

I plagiarized Chicken Soup for the Soul
           after we were force-fed its trite passages
           (so it seemed to me – I hated it)
     strong past life imprints
             tearing present apart
     of course I got caught
I lacked the language
     the metaphors
                 – the red, red roses –
                 I knew I did
     how could my eleven define love?

only years later,
     the unchanging definition was given to me
only years later,
     a pure example, to be echoed
absorbed into my roots
                          my Guru
          – how shall I mind to be
               an echo of utter purity? –
          so now love is my wish for all others,
                                                    for you
                   to be happy
                     effortlessly & evermore
                                         & quickly

Categories
Poetry

way out within

there is a portal
escape route out
             no need to scream
             no need to shout

is it above us?
or is it below?
             it cannot be without
             it is within we go

and when we discover
the truth that lies therein
             that all is mind, is empty
             pure and free of sin

only happiness resides
in our pure, loving core
             only a kind, peaceful
             consciousness, forevermore

(the question is,
             do you want it?)

Categories
Buddhism Philosophy Poetry

the space between

I look up to see
the space between
the spring’s bright leaves,
framing failing light

the eve’s chill falls
as the day’s warmth lifts
dew dances on the lawn
while my brook babbles on

as of late, my words betray
what my mind creates –
for with incorrect name
my suffering’s made

beneath me now
the earth is cold,
this rock is hard,
I’m feeling old

so many lifetimes,
all the same
wasted, wasted
all in vain —

now depend on heart-filled meaning,
mindfulness, do practice, pray
the power of delusions, cease!
and all bad habits, slay!

anew my happiness is born
here and now today
and with constant prayer & blessing
will never pass away

how lucky are these eyes
to behold periwinkle skies
how lucky are these toes
that walk where wild grows
how lucky are these hands
that touch the living earth
how lucky is the mind
appearing Bodhichitta birth

how lucky to be giving
to create the cause of wealth
how lucky I may nurture
to create the cause of health
how lucky to be kind
that I may create the cause of peace
how lucky to hold compassion
so all hatred, anger cease
how lucky to be patient
and know beauty will ensue
how lucky to be loving
and again feel love so true

Categories
Poetry

Unilluminated

having over-assumed wisdom
having been used for others’ own ends

             I am puddled

a fractal coastline
                       after catastrophe

             where should I find fault?

Categories
Poetry

A sad song

I am hurting
   deeply wounded
to my core
only this time –
it’s not personal
it’s nothing I’ve done or haven’t done
       at least not recently

it’s not who I am, rather
it’s who I’ve been

it’s not what I didn’t do
it’s what I’ve done countless times over

self-cherished, ignorant
      born into imprints, big boots to fill
innocently believing in myself

not as an enlightened being
     but merely inherently existent
                    (betraying myself)

harmfully,     forever non truth
making up our non reality
                       collectively

   O, to escape a cage that has no bars!
   Where’s one run? Where’s one go?

we dance and shake and make do
     and then – handed instructions,
mapped, a perfect escape route
     tested, tried, and true
     a happy result, always

     I would dare – but alone?
why will no one come with me?
         will no one come with me?

Categories
Poetry

clearwing

not good enough?
       you little moth
               drawn to my flame
fearing I’ll burn your wings

but I am not fire (your past)
        I am air (your future)
               a Tara,
                           wind element

you choose disbelief
       to break hearts, cause tears
& still, you deserve such clarity of mind,
       divine,

you little moth

you’re enough

Categories
Poetry

Warped Regression

I am wretched
  spastic in time
visions zoom and swoop
I am not alleviated of guilt
I am a burden of my own burdening

Knocked to the hard ground
       concrete bloodied
pieces of knuckles, jaws
  scattered about
       detritus of a coming war
  spastic in time
visions sink, exhaled
  a finale, last breath
I am not alleviated of guilt
I will not profess my own burdening

Seamless lips, faulted
  refusing to admit witness
slammed with responsibility
  reaping, weeping, false confession
but a word, treason, is not spoken
  and the clouds do not lift
visions sink, heavy, inhaled
  as poison, saddled, trained
a whistle blows, heard for miles
  you know it’s gone —
a train of burden

You ought to have seen this coming
       hisses a Voice outta dark
          whispers like old wheels
       grinding to a halt on a rusted track
                        (obligation bearing back)

And if I did?
         words evaporated, arisen from
           a vibrating box,
         moved by mind

And remain ignorantly attached?
        But why!
            — surprise in the Voice

                                          silence

Addiction to the merry-go-round
of burden,
the colours, the depths of pain
    the highs  of   lows
the energy, vibrating
       words,   vibrating
     endowed with mind-meaning
   and mind-made-up

The Voice can see what
         lack of service lacks
  and   stops.   shocked —
            disappears, abandoning

            Please!  I laugh
Please!  I laugh
                   and laugh