Author: K. Samways

Constant observer. Ad hoc responder.

Categories
Book Recommendation Book Review Music

Book Recommendation | 2

I can’t wait to recommend Marcus Starr’s debut novel, Nora’s Curse – a quick-paced and comedic thriller featuring loveable bassist bartender and Canadian lead character, Nora, whose wish just might come true. But is that a good thing? Especially as she deals with competition at work and the fact that she’s possibly dating The Midnight Rambler?!

Aside from the fact that I can totally see this becoming a hilarious, exciting and addicting mini series on Netflix, I want to recommend this novel because I genuinely enjoyed reading it! I’m so tired of the same old stories and big name authors (appreciated, but exhausted). Nora’s Curse is something altogether different and yet familiar. You don’t broach the topic of wishes without the old adage coming up … yet this story never feels stale.

Starr weaves current issues into the background narrative making the novel relevant and easily captures readers’ suspension of disbelief. Parts of the novel make you wonder if you are enjoying a beach read or dancing with the devil. Get ready for sex, drugs, rock n’ roll, mayhem and maybe a bit of magic. (Or is it old time religion?)

You can find Nora’s Curse on Amazon or on December 18, grab a copy in person at Starr’s Book Launch in Ancaster!

12 p.m. to 3 p.m.
at the
Coach & Lantern Pub
384 Wilson St. E
Ancaster, ON

Did I mention there will be live music by Starr himself?

Hope to see you there – or that you can get your hands on a copy! Let’s bring this one to the screen.

Categories
Buddhism Love Letters Thirsty Thursday

Happy | Letter 8

To the Musician,

How can I count the ways
I have experienced joy
with you
already

How can I tell thee
the way you make me feel
when I know I have
created the causes

How can I share wisdom
when I am drowning
in samsara’s sea?

Still, you have helped
dispel the ignorance
of a thousand aeons,
a dreadful darkness,
with a single torch

How can I tell you
how happy I feel
how content I am
in the present moment
here and now
with you
while also planning
our escape

Because to
escape suffering
permanently
is my only wish
especially
with you

happy
beside me

Love, the Muse

Categories
Philosophy

Become the Jedi Master of Your Life

Anger is a poison that eats away at your life giving energy winds.

Why would you indulge in such an addiction? What benefit is there?

All those giving up anger in turn for peace and love, for better health, better relationships, rejoice! And do not lose faith. Challenges will come.

The experience of healing anger is not linear. It is not better, better, better. It is many different things for different people. Sometimes better, bad, better, better, bad, better, better, worse you’ve ever been, better, best yet.

Not always. The only thing that matters is never giving up.

Become the Jedi Master of your own mind and respond to your thoughts and feelings appropriately.

May your path be blessed.

Categories
Dreams Saturday Expressions

Three Dreams | Session 13

I’ve had four to five memorable dreams over the past year. Here are three of them.

Chapter One

In the first dream, I was back in a student house.
I had to pack up and be out by the next day.

Too tired to do anything that evening,
I went to bed in a sleeping bag
on a mattress on the floor.

A recent partner was spending the
night in the other room.

I had a large upturned couch
in the next room and spilled
jewellery and beads all over the carpet. 

The next morning, he got up to leave.

Aren’t you going to help me? I asked.

No. I just needed a place to stay the night.

Oh. Disappointment.
Also thinking, how the hell
am I going to do this alone?

When are you going to get it?
I’m not here to help you.

He emphasizes
what should have been obvious.

Chapter Two

In the second dream, I was walking
down the street to my mom’s house.

He was walking back to a van
parked outside her house.

I was surprised.
Surely he would have told me he was in town.
Disappointment.

He gets in a tour/camper bus. He is with his ex,
some girls from work and school, and a new face.

Without restraint I put my hand on his crotch
and aggressively groped him while choking out
Nice to see you. Thanks for saying hi.

I exited, lacking any shred of dignity.

Chapter Three

In the third dream,
I was walking through mist.

He came out of nowhere.
Why didn’t you tell me you wanted to talk?

I tried. Do you want to now?

Why didn’t you tell me?
He faded back into the fog.  

Predictable.

Categories
Photography Poetry

The Rideau Canal | FF 17

I made you a picnic for dinner
many nights that week

You showed me where you used to live
with your last ex (there are many)

I’ve joined the lineup
and I’m not eager to see

our once-sacred spots shared, although
in hindsight, it was predictable

your memories still float, caught
in the historic locks of

the Rideau canal

Categories
Poetry Thirsty Thursday

Thirsty Thursday | How love was the end of the Pillsbury Doughboy

(His last words)

I feel gooey inside
I mean more than usual
I think my insides are melting

something warm is happening in my heart
it’s making a bubble 
something’s about to pop

this really doesn’t feel quite right
I think I’m rising from the inside out
the heat supposed to be external

but this is gutting me
tearing me apart

hot bit by bit expanding

and do you see this bulge here?
no! not my stomach!

hoo-hoo!! 

don’t poke me at a time like this —
can’t you see I’m in pain?

oh! dire pain!

being wrenched apart
baked wrong side out

surely this isn’t in the directions —
can we trouble shoot?

something’s happening to my throat
the words aren’t 
                coming out good
no more
ooey gooey heart 
hoo-hooo

Okay… so this isn’t the thirstiest. x.x but can you picture that it probably isn’t Mrs. Poppie Fresh Pillsbury Doughboy doing it for him. 😉

You might not need a tall glass of water, but perhaps a cold glass of milk and a hot, soft chocolate chip cookie would satisfy you.

Categories
Poetry

Summer Affair

Not fair!

I said I wouldn’t become
attached to you,
changing condition

yet, so much sorrow
fills minds that grasp
at the losing

a mistaken conception:
yes, it is the summer
that offers me joy

so easy to believe
when winter brings
us pain – in joints,
in frostbitten fingers
in the minds of
jealousy when our friends
flee to now-appreciated
tropical timeshares — now

no more summertime
to share

one dream ends
while we’re trapped
in another

romantic autumn’s
place will come, when
this dull and tiresome
sadness becomes boring
to my fitful, grasping mind

but now, I see only
a broken promise to myself
I wouldn’t become attached
I said

I must have failed
why else would I lay
blame with the season’s change
for my woe

Categories
Poetry

The Worst Thing

written in 2013

It’s selfish and conceited, but sometimes I like to think I was your worst.
I’m the little period in your life you swallow pills to forget.
I’m the worst thing to ever happen to you.

I kept you up all night, tossing in your bed,
while thoughts went ’round your head,
like:
who the fuck is she, and
did she mean what she said?

I’m a little piece of nightmare that got stuck in your dream teeth.
I’m the ghost devil on your shoulder, that you thought you’d shed.

Every so often you recall what I did,
and think:
shit, what did I get into, and
can it never happen again?

I was conceited when I loved you; I was selfish when I left.
I tossed words without abandon; I belittled what we had.

Misery loves company, was my battle cry.
I hung the phrase on all my banners, and
let harsh words fall from my lips.

Each second I felt scorned, I thought would be my last
Every teardrop that fell from my eye,
you knew I blamed on you.
I stuck a dagger in your chest, hoping to rake through
your ribs and crack them down to dust.

I love to imagine how I was the worst thing to ever happen to you,
and in that I will be immortalized.

I’m the slanderous tale told at the cabin, and ghost story for the young.
A cautionary tale of psycho bitches, and what can come undone.
A warning for your friends, a comedy for the bored,
a thank-your-lucky-stars-it-wasn’t-you for the unappreciative ignored.

I will outlive all the rest, based on my infamy of awfulness.

And then I feel downright bad.

Because I loved you in the moment. I treasured what we had.
I trusted every word you spoke, believed each lie you said —
I think we both did —

and when I started believing I was the
worst thing that could happen to you, that I was crazy and insane,
I ran away and still blame you, even if it’s all in vain.

Because I was the worst thing to ever happen to you.

Categories
Buddhism Philosophy

Non Attachment is Renunciation

While we can happily enjoy conditions while they are good, there is no logical reason to become attached to any particular condition, because they are always changing.

All conditions, situations, people are temporary. They may last what feels like a long time or they may be brief, changing suddenly, unexpectedly, perhaps lost forever. Because when we manifest the same ‘souls’ or similar appearance in our next life, we have absolutely no recollection that we’ve lived it all before. Loved it all before. Losing it once more. And what lessons have we learned? What imprints are left?

With wisdom we can enjoy each appearance, as it arises, unattached. The end of coming is going. The end of meeting is parting. It happens all the time. All at once.

Why take anything so seriously? Life is but a dream. All we need to do to make it a happy one is create causes. By performing virtue. Sacrifice the self-cherishing, maker of all suffering. Ditch the attachment, rooted in self-grasping ignorance. Renounce samsara and all the pain it’s worth.

Stop harming others. Stop harming your self. Three deep breaths. Relax. Shake your sillies out. Volunteer. Don’t take yourself so seriously. Loosen up. Let it be. Love. Become Enlightened. Rejoice endlessly.

Categories
Poetry

Pandora’s Box

I’ve come across you
twice before

and each time

I opened you!

Alas, even
the second time
I knew!

To tell you
the truth…

I would do it again.

It is said,
we run straight
to the causes
of our suffering

My experience
could be proof

Though I may act
quite aloof
(or at times a goof)

I am burning with 
desire inside
egotistical pride

seven sins wrapped
up tight

in the unforgetting world
it is difficult
to let go of attachment

So faced with the choice 
once more – to open
or leave closed
hell’s wicked door

I swing it wide
and hop the hearth
to the other side

to tell you the truth…
I’m just exhausting
negative karma

bringing about 
the end of these
tiresome cycles

how ’bout you help? 

Tell me the truth…
would you open the box?