Tag: Buddhism

On Being a Writer (this time)

Post author By K. Samways
Post date November 11, 2024
No Comments on On Being a Writer (this time)

I have entered the dream world
          it is dark
                  madness ensues
      I’ve come unglued
monsters lurk and
      a peculiar quirk
has taken hold of me
      reality      not what it seems

I have entered the dream state
           it passes over my waking eyes
a film, betraying a wild guise
      a darkness taking over me
absent     absent is the light
      in a nightmare world
full of haunting fright
         how could it feel so right!

I have entered the dream
I see its walls surrounding me
seemingly limitless,
      yet I cannot run further
than my limitations
      in a meat puppet state
I cannot wait any longer
      to start becoming stronger
I must lucid make
            my dull dreaming mind
I cannot afford to become unkind
                             — not now! —
and forget …

I must remember the dream
             has taken hold of me
it’s pulled me in and under
and threatens to rip asunder
                        all that I’ve worked for
all that my continuum has worked for
                  to lose all I have and more
           futures of past work
            I cannot be the jerk
that throws it all away
and yet,
            I cannot be the one to stay

I must wake up!

Still, I have been pulled under
         I have metamorphosed as a cicada
to scratch my way to the surface,
      crawling above ground
            to birth such sound
and to shed such skin and skeleton
     like the selfless king
               abandons his crown!
while in samsara’s sea they drown
                                          no more

I must wake up!

In the dream world
     imagination is the creator
of all sights and sounds
   and smells and feels and fears
      and tastes and don’t forget
         the touches you don’t get
      — your mind creates those too
in the dream world
     the artist thrives or dies
depending on will and disposition
          — or is it now our despotism?
for it is time I must remind
                                                   (who?)
      it’s pure       imagination
         —   creepy factories aside    —

I have entered the dream world
     and so I say goodbye
to the ordinary people I once knew
   to the human race in which I grew
      to the good friends, in numbers few,
oh how when I write, I will miss you!
      but only a solo journey ensues
(the synonym is madness)
      for it’s certainly not entirely lonely
with all those characters arguing in there

          CAN YOU SHUT THE HELL UP
                   FOR JUST A SECOND
           SO I CAN PRETEND
                   TO BE NORMAL?

Nope.

Not fair.

This familiarity is based on
     past impressions
          with no guarantee of
     future impressions
           (& little return on investment)

you think I’d shift gears

Alas! like so many lifetimes
       before me
                      I write
   I enter the dream state
                      I strive
   I will realize my mind
                      this time,
   with a qualified Spiritual Guide.

Tags attachment, Buddhism, creative writing, dream world, Dreams, familiarity, giving, imagination, karma, life, madness, past lives, poem, poet, Poetry, reality, reincarnation, solitary work, world building, writer, writing

Buddhism Philosophy Poetry

What is man?

Man
ignorant being
lucky opportunity
nearly impossible to find
how stupid to throw it away

Is man stupid?

Man argues about
what to be called
how to be perceived
as if possible to control
externally!

Man abandons his own mind
aids his own demise
has every chance at happiness
but cannot wait
for temporary satisfaction to subside
before another yearning must arise
chase chase chase die!

Just watch!

What is man?

A near-beast, I am
though, for the first time
seeing the trap
I have the instructions
a treasure route, escape map
as man, as woman
it matters not!

Only that we try
and we do try!
to grasp this
nearly impossible to find
lucky opportunity
non-ignorant being
man

Tags be offended, Buddhism, context, creative writing, emptiness, grasping, human, human nature, humanity, identity, ignorance, inherent existence, karma, man, philosphy, poem, Poetry, reality, rebirth, reputation, woman

Buddhism Good Fortune Poetry

Reliance

I am happy
despite circumstances

I am strong
despite my gloom

I am calm
despite storm

I am fearless
despite impending doom

I am giving
despite my poverty

I am glad
despite my lack

I am friendly
despite loneliness

I progress
despite setback

I give with bodhichitta
I give fearlessness and love
I give Dharma and materials
I offer sun and moon above

I offer each and every moment
of pure practice, I transform
I abandon all delusions
and only virtue I perform

But how could I achieve this?
certainly not alone
only through my Spiritual Guide,
and the Three Jewels upon his throne

Poetry

a part

I am not apart from my faith
but I am apart from people
       from my mountain cave
I compose poems and songs
       I meditate and I realize emptiness
and still the people come in throngs
       to accuse me of such silliness
feelings that have long since
                                    come and gone

for aeons, our own harm befalls us
but still we blame,
       in mistaken consciousness
still the same
       in all our actions ignorant
I am not apart from my faith
but I am apart from others
       in their silence and their pain
I am apart from you
       and here I fear I will remain

Tags a part, apart, art, Buddhism, buddhist faith, creative writing, emptiness, faith, milarepa, mistaken consciousness, no separation, poem, Poetry, reality, separate, spiritual guide, truth, writing

Buddhism Meditation Poetry

Power of Promise

I promised to be patient
I promised to be kind
I promised I would wait
until the end of time

Yet father’s banging at the door
and we all do yield to death,
what’s more delusions bind my grip
and fear has caught my breath

stop

rely

I promised to be patient
I promised I would wait
but still ‘round every corner
I expect to meet my fate
— and I do!

But it’s never happy!
and even if my heart is glad
no memory of me is had
and so we lose our state
— again!

stop

offer

I promised to be patient
I promised I would pray
I promised I would escape
     Samsara’s silly plays
                   (all pleasure, mere name
                      real grasping, suffer, blame)

So each day I practice
through the happy and the sad
and even though the sun’s been shining
my heart feels rain
— am I mad?!

stop

receive

I promised to be patient
I promised to be kind
and so I request blessings
to restore this peace to mind

I know I am resilient
with the Guru at my heart
I know with patient acceptance
I excel at Dharma’s peaceful art

So with blessings in my mind
these delusions I outsmart!
I maintain a stable practice
remembering: no partless part

Tags blessing, buddha, Buddhism, consistency, creative writing, dharma, dharma practice, emptiness, Guru, offering, poem, Poetry, practice, resilience, stable practice, strength

Good Fortune Poetry

Ordinary Existence

I hate this lifetime
she says

With all the instructions
and all the conditions?
Why?
How could you hate such fortune?

Because all the people
            I have ever known,
                            ever loved
                in all my lives
           have forgotten me

Not only
          do they not remember
our love, shared,     our words
                        our bonds …
they are all sick, wounded, dying
this vision becomes a nightmare
   threatens lives I care about
      makes me hate my own
and then I see
        I am the maker and destroyer
but never more a life-enjoyer
       — at least not this life anyway
this one with pain that’s here to stay
   because that is samsara’s way
      first it gives and then it takes
breath, floods, fires, earthquakes,
      fortune, time, fame, mistakes, and
breath

It all comes rushing in and then
it goes

Absent is the gentle flow,
                        of another life
                  one in which I failed
          one where I succumbed to strife
          for otherwise this appearance
                        wouldn’t be
                             (couldn’t be)

So which delusion can I blame
   for producing this life, this name
I happily give up for happiness
   a wisdom realizing emptiness
                  I’m tired of grief’s game
        set me free!

While with wisdom, I reflect,
   I find… I hate this lifetime
                                all the same
           but despite its constant pain
             not a moment spent in vain

I will escape

Tags attachment, Buddhism, creative writing, delusions, emptiness, fate, hatred, ignorance, karma, love, love life, memories, past lives, poem, Poetry, reality, three poisons

Buddhism Good Fortune Poetry

An Offering

In the New Kadampa Tradition, we perform a practice called Offering to the Spiritual Guide on the 10th and 25th day of each month. Typically practitioners meet to recite chanted prayers and bring food and flower offerings to our Spiritual Guide. This verse is my offering.

~~~

Sometimes I feel
         I was built to handle anything
                          limitless potential
                                   powerful, strong

Other times, too sensitive
         to get along
                          difficult to get by
                          or even make do
         I don’t want for much
                    and yet there’s never enough
         and the disappointment’s strong

Am I made up of feeling,
mistaken discrimination?

Why can I never make contact
                   when I try & touch
                              another,     soft   skin
                                                   — lost
                     gone          by the time I’m there

                                 it’s only    air

                    and though it’s space I crave,
                                          it’s a high cost

tears, sorrow
                         yet goodbye to rage
             I’ve freed myself from anger’s cage
                         yet sadness remains here
                                          all the same
                         delusions wrong,
                                                  familiar, strong
             I beg them leave
                                please do not stay!

I see a face
             familiar shape,
                     I know that walk
             I’ve seen that gait
                     I recognize that stride
             he takes his time
                     if he has rhythm,
                                  I have his rhyme
             and false reason
                              keeps us apart —
             though why should we meet
             when every greeting
                          ends the same way
             goodbye, depart until
                           some other day

So though I want to beg & cry
      & sit & pretend I don’t know why
             this pain, though here, won’t stay
           it’s mere causes created
                            now ripened seeds
                   appearing here as suffering
          yearning great as I’ve felt before
                    wishing there was something more
                    while this vision reveals all
          it’s just my mind
                         it’s not out there,
                                       though it’s appearing
                                                       everywhere

I can write it down
                     I can share some words
             & still the truth remains unheard
         for causes we don’t create
                   to sit still    ,     think    ,   concentrate
          on something more virtuous than hate
                    why can’t we learn to meditate
                                       on happiness & love?
                     How is that too hard    (as I’ve heard
                                                                 whiners complain)
                                          & my heart breaks

So sensitive, so still
            so patiently I work,     I wait
       as effortful seeds
                     I do create
                        and generously dedicate
                     for others’ joy
                                          & may hearts heal
                                   anvil strong
                                               unbreakable & vajra-like
                                                            until
                                                    Enlightenment.

Tags Buddhism, creative writing, emptiness, karma, offering to the Spiritual Guide, osg, past lives, poem, Poetry, prayer, reality

Buddhism Poetry

Part of it all: III

(continued from)

<3>

I sit apart
yearning
misunderstanding
my separateness
does not exist

and still
it is effortful
to fight such suffering
deceitful maras
mistaken minds

I am but a drop
at my heart
at the heart of all hearts
inseparable, pure
with the Dharma cure

to be a part of it all
happily

Tags Buddhism, creative writing, dependent existence, dharma, happiness, healing, love, mara, poem, Poetry, pure, reality, suffering

Buddhism Dreams Poetry

osprey

Post author By K. Samways
Post date July 9, 2024
No Comments on osprey

I see
an osprey kick a gull in the head
& catch a fish
this morning

emerge compassion
for attachment
killing
though thought rare sight
— such common poison!

emptiness
a play of light
arises before me
due to mind

it’s only mind

I must endure
just one more day —
time to love & time to play

I must endure this suffering
for I have caused it
that I see

these imprints strong
self-grasping me

like clouds appear
in a summer sky
seeming so blue
in my sense’s eye
and clouds so white
appear to dance
changing shape
and circumstance
with one another
scenes create
a turkey vulture roosts
while whales tempt fate
to swim so high
up in the sky
it almost makes me
question why
I feel that I can wait
to truly escape
this earthly suffering
finding no one here
who is happier than me

finding no couple who’s truly at peace
seeing no being that moves with ease

observing not one who can work together
without hatred, attachment, greed

should I give up? — No!

I’ll change my aspiration instead

I aspire to be truly happy, a pure example

& although I wish for another by my side
one who would face the changing tide,
I know in another I cannot seek
any joy or peace to be —
for it all must come from me

& although I strive to give & give
in humanness, I can’t let go
of my own unfulfilled hunny-do list —
this deluded partner, lazy, low —
by whose esteem I now accomplish
many of my deeds — instead of
saving for me, a pure aspiration
— enlightenment for all, equally

& although a man in measure
may grant me earthly pleasure
there’s not a time I can recall
unmixed with poison from the fall

an apple sweet, an apple tart
both eventually rot & fall apart
never singular, & still
each wish we’d like it to fulfill

the flavourful & wellness start
healthy gut, balanced, body art

this world is crazy, bizarre, insane —
& if I believe I can lay the blame
with anyone else,
I’ve already failed

so instead I vow to see, in each & every irony
a new teaching, a blessing, gift
in each disturbance, every rift

a chance to see things appear to fall apart
never once one thing
except in name
and with delusions I lay all blame

self-cherishing, self-grasped —
in dependence, same

I am so tired of samsara’s games
I quit

on to Enlightenment, charging forth
with Dharma’s wealth

I’m collecting merit for good health

for long, long years in which to help
all beings do the same

to happiness, I now lay claim

watching the gulls upon the bend
leaves me with these words to send
to you

thank you for your time,
and love, and coming to this place
may your mind be ever blessed
with peace & happiness

Tags Buddhism, creative writing, delusional, delusions, emptiness, fishing, karma, love, nature, osprey, poem, Poetry, reality, virtue, wildlife

Buddhism Philosophy Poetry

determination

I am only a witness,
transparent eye
a non judgemental mirror —
or at least a mirror who keeps
her judgments to herself

I am the nursery rhyme before it’s written,
the angel before the fall
the dream before the nightmare
the ring before the call

I hear the future coming,
still feel the distant past,
see outcomes from our actions
that for years & years will last

I weep for sad beginnings
I laugh at mad hellos
see insanity all around us
and suffering only grow

I am ready to escape this
ready to depart
ejecting all attachment
burning all my art

I have not one creation
of which I am proud
except those that come from virtue,
those soundless,
those I’ve vowed

I sow these seeds in silence
for my words have caused much pain
all contaminated actions
seemingly in vain
(* focus on intention *)

I hear the whistle blow,
a hundred miles from home
smell the fields of mountain thyme
growing round the purple heather
and still cannot decide
if to stay or go

until I walk the streets
see the suffering
hear the cries
smell the stink
feel the terror
taste the drink

then it all comes rushing back,
each and every pleasure,
that I’ve had it all before
— it’s time to think!
I cannot do this anymore!
I won’t!

So with reliance, offering, requesting,
my life I do lay down
only for something better
more meaningful, profound

with diligent, stable practice
(which, finally, I’ve found)
and compassionate, loving heart
I fall upon the Bodhisattva’s ground

I bow before the new moon,
and rising with the sun
try to take things lightly,
because all is mind and none is one

Tags attachment, Buddhism, creative writing, emptiness, karma, love, nature, pleasure, poem, Poetry, reality, renunciation, samsara, transparent eye, witness, writing