Tag: karma

Poetry

Warped Regression

I am wretched
spastic in time
visions zoom and swoop
I am not alleviated of guilt
I am a burden of my own burdening

Knocked to the hard ground
concrete bloodied
pieces of knuckles, jaws
scattered about
detritus of a coming war
spastic in time
visions sink, exhaled
a finale, last breath
I am not alleviated of guilt
I will not profess my own burdening

Seamless lips, faulted
refusing to admit witness
slammed with responsibility
reaping, weeping, false confession
but a word, treason, is not spoken
and the clouds do not lift
visions sink, heavy, inhaled
as poison, saddled, trained
a whistle blows, heard for miles
you know it’s gone —
a train of burden

You ought to have seen this coming
       hisses a Voice outta dark
          whispers like old wheels
       grinding to a halt on a rusted track
                      (obligation bearing back)

And if I did?
         words evaporated, arisen from
           a vibrating box,
         moved by mind

And remain ignorantly attached?
But why!
— surprise in the Voice

silence

Addiction to the merry-go-round
of burden,
the colours, the depths of pain
    the highs of   lows
the energy, vibrating
       words,   vibrating
     endowed with mind-meaning
   and mind-made-up

The Voice can see what
         lack of service lacks
and   stops.   shocked —
            disappears, abandoning

Please! I laugh
Please! I laugh
and laugh

Tags abstract, addiction, attachment, creative writing, emptiness, energy, futility, good vibrations, ignorance, karma, meaning, mind made reality, nonsense, poem, Poetry, service, slaughterhouse-five, suffering, writing

Poetry

The Leper

Untouched
     and why
such disgust at
     contagious negativity
gangrene and gross
     debilitating degeneration
carnivorous and swift
     progression is easy
unneeded consent
     submit    submit
and why
     untouched except
with separate wash
     still never away
she wept
    and why

Tags creative writing, disease, ignorance, karma, poem, Poetry, self-cherishing, separateness, untouched, why, writing

Buddhism Poetry

Futile complaint

All the conditions
all the instructions
all the sorrows
the pains
the long introductions
you should know suffering
and develop intention

You have all the conditions
all the instructions
all the pleasures
such joys
you should know these are temporary
called changing suffering
and seek the wisdom realizing
emptiness instead

Tags Buddhism, buddhist philosophy, changing suffering, emptiness, happiness, Impermanence, insight, joy, karma, Philosophy, poem, Poetry, reality, suffering

Poetry

A fickle thing

I started to lose interest
where it began, I cannot tell –
was it diseases of delusions?
or the medications as well?

Aversion to sugar
I dislike that sweet —
but a little too tart?
sours my treat

A dash of salt
is too salty still
when I want a
silly snack

Creamy vanilla
    or buttered plain
        are two with simple
                               lack

Yet mocha dark
       or caramel glazed
              are off my beaten
                                path

So what is it I fancy?
what is it I crave?
and what will satisfy me?
or quick become depraved?

For once a pleasure rises
    a pleasure, she must fall
    and he who sympathizes with
                                attachment
       is he who loses all

For grasping at an object,
impermanent, illusion best
is ignorance, the birthplace
of delusions, all the rest

So what will satisfy me
     external to my mind?
Nothing nothing no   thing
         for all that is
         is named, is mind

Tags art, attachment, books, creative writing, emptiness, endings, fickleness, fiction, Impermanence, karma, love, mind, poem, Poetry, reality, writing

Poetry Saturday Expressions

What now? | Session 18

If it was never fixed,
it can’t be rebroken

yet it’s shattered now completely

while I am made whole

I have been repurposed
utterly renewed

now I know
freedom, not heartache,
ensues

amazing – I waited
                   so patiently —
. . .
         okay, no
                    I begged
I literally got on my knees and pleaded

(humiliating really)

for C L O S U R E

I practically pulled my own teeth for it

(I simply stole a toothbrush instead)

I was intoxicated by the lust for a bitter end –

while being denied it again and again

knowing it’s going to come
inevitably

so I begged for early release

the buildup was incredible
intense at times

(filled with that crazed yearning)

but, as it so often is, then withheld

so when the climax didn’t come

time went by and trepidation

S t R e t c H e d

to a numbed oblivion, almost
forgotten – then rediscovered and

(as I was waiting for, begging for)

followed by the instant explosion,

so incredibly quick we call brief into question

a lit fuse to a pinch of dynamite

I waited for the punch! And it never came

it merely sizzled
a spark, lacking flame
and while I wish

so strongly, I could say, you too
were just a sizzle to me

instead I just admit you were a strong second

(sorry, never a first)

and of course such thirst for you

has permanently ended

no hurt no difficult goodbye

no hard feelings

just sweet, sweet relief

what now?

Enlightenment

Tags attachment, blockage lifted, closure, creative writing, ending, enlightenment, freedom, goodbye, karma, poem, Poetry, Saturday Expressions

Poetry

Lost Life Loss

a memory

it is not mine

upon a log I sit

‘neath the snowy pine

under darkened sky

beside earthen stove

a bitter wind kicks up

in the moonlit grove

the jingle of the horse & sleigh

as it carries him so far away

I cannot weep, I do not cry

a muted heart is breaking

and as the silence lies

a frozen bough is snapping – loud

to crack the quiet

still, expected in the freeze

I do not startle, there is no breeze

no wind at back to impel me

my bones have stiffened here

my mind is anything but clear

as the winter’s solitude

forces delusions rather rude

inner quietude never did follow outer

now it’s simply easier to hear

internal screaming

though the fire burns, continuous

it takes us not

because it cannot reach

what we refuse we got

buried below

alive and dead

some peace & love

blessings bestowed

how are these all stripped from me?

as he plods on down the snowy path

I know he won’t be coming back

so I’m wrecked to watch him leave

though it is not my memory

Tags art, attachment, books, creative writing, death, emotion, feeling, grief, karma, loss, Photography, poem, Poetry, robert frost, snowy path, sorrow, winter, writing

Buddhism Poetry

Second Disappointment

You search for conventional cause
but come up empty handed
not quite the emptiness you seek
because the suffering is still there
the realness of a wound laid bare

and why not rub salt in it —
we’re out of control anyway

a disappointing dream, yes, sore
red, raw, sinewy once more
the band aid won’t stick
and the solitary peace that binds,
too, won’t stick in spite of such mess

Shariputra’s demon will not
prevent my efforts as a spiritual warrior
even if injured once more

after all, we’re all lunatics in
the madhouse of samsara
          arrogant prisoner
        trapped
hard to believe it’s not permanent
          until we move beyond
                           conventional cause

you want to be angry,
but on what authority?

what justification could you have
for such delusion?

Thinking of virtue, compassion and love
-how do you forget love?
the simple wish for others to be happy

I am so sorry for you that you
do not know this feeling

a flame carried for all living beings
despite my own suffering
‘cause that’s life

and what say you to that?
that in a moment of weakness
                we see it all
and having been forsaken, both,
             and both put through hell
             and failing miserably
to the lower realms we could descend
              if this silly hatred doesn’t end

it’s temporary anyway

do you resist?

Tags absent, appearance, conventional, demon, dream, emptiness, karma, kindness, love, obstruction, poem, shariputra

Poetry

Halloween Haunt

I don’t feel right
I can’t be normal
an alien in another’s skin —
how uncomfortable at times
I see myself needing
I see myself performing
I watch the satisfaction of each urge
depressed (only) momentarily, popped
deflated pimple, red, temporary
embarrassing, addictive
craving will resurface, a monster
people argue its existence — Loch Ness —
but the lie lays bare before us
recognized or not

so, it is with robotic sensibilities
I feel myself refuse to yield
to another pointless pleasure
and instead feel pain!
which I know is not the way —
but how else will I recognize
when I am being led astray
if not by monitoring such deceits
especially harmful, discovering

my own mind is the evil
that haunts me

Tags attachment, creative writing, halloween, haunt, hook of attachment, karma, need, non virtue, performance, pleasure, poem, Poetry, possession, purification, satisfaction, seeds, self, spirit

Poetry

Part of it all

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I want to be
part of it all
not individual and alone
not an add-on, but integral
I want my purity to be yours
and I want to spark the virtue
in all minds, together
like water, taking shape

I want to see
the aggregate of aggregates
“I” am
I want to see the “I” differently
so I am not trickster-trapped
by selfish self-cherishing
grasping the most important “me”

I want to be
the cedar on the rock,
the bark on the trunk,
a drop of water in the earth
a molecule of worth
immeasurable yet meaningful
a part of it all

Tags collective, creative writing, emptiness, inherent existence, karma, nature, parts, poem, Poetry, purification, purity, reality, virtue, water

Poetry

Tired, but waking up

I’m tired of being blamed for the
inadequacies of others

reflected back at them
glaring

omissions come to light

you hate it, yes,
but it’s your mind’s appearance

though you cannot concede,
conceive
such truth

let the mirror show

I am tired

and so not accountable

for you

for me,
             I take full responsibility
though I depend
completely
   upon the kindness of all beings
                 for every   little   thing

for my actions – wait
— ha-ha, I see!

now just what they have
done to me

I, too, have reflections
   staring back
        challenging
             to acknowledge, purify

and why not rejoice
while at it

lucky tired me
I am my own mirror

clearly,
I see.

Tags Buddhism, creative writing, karma, luck, lucky, me, mirror, poem, Poetry, rejoice, responsibility, suffering, waking up