Tag: Poetry

Poetry

Even You

I always wanted the best for you
that’s kind of why I wished you knew
what you wanted in life, mostly
and, you know, kind of who you’d like to be
maybe one or two simple goals
a job, career — a commitment-phobe
is what I got instead
with stress and anxiety round
his balding head, and don’t get me started
on the gluten allergy

okay, I’ll try not to make it personal –

as a bodhisattva, with bodhichitta
I now pray
for each and every being to be happy
each and every day
for all suffering to be gone
for even you to get your fill
for not one enemy I claim
not one ounce of ill will remains

I hope you’re happy on your path
I hope you’re surrounded with love and laughs
I haven’t left a bit of wrath
to blame anything on you
even when I wanted to
instead I saw the good you grew
in me and many others

despite the bumpy, gritty roads
calves in ditches and girl scout notes
the ups and downs and round and rounds
and endless suffering,
I’d choose it all again —
if I don’t escape this life
we’re bound to repeat that goddam strife
because we couldn’t close the loop
our destiny will be to regroup

unless one of us is liberated,
one of us is freed
although I wish it would be you
I must know it will be me

if what I see in you,
is merely a mirror of myself
a bloody tormented soul
I’ve now left upon the shelf
a chrysalis ripped apart
the snakeskin that I shed
unlike losing hair upon your head,
intentional,
even you remember intention
maybe you even have it now

I believe we all can change

I’m doing it somehow

all beings will destroy delusions
all virtue will ensue
all beings become Buddhas

even me
even you

Tags creative writing, cycle, endless, future, karma, past, poem, Poetry, reality, samsara, time

Poetry

Obscure Escape

I cannot find the quiet
I cannot drive far enough away
I cannot abide in place
I cannot fight the fray
I cannot find the space
I cannot prance nor play
I am held within a cage,
a dream that will not fade away

I cannot find a peace
I cannot dwell in lonely caves
I cannot energy release
I cannot ride the waves
I cannot tame my inner beast
I cannot for patience save
although I know this is a dream,
I struggle to be brave

I cannot find the silence,
I cannot fight my demons off
I cannot give up hope
I cannot be still with worries fraught!
I cannot skate this slippery slope
I cannot miss my shot
if in samsara I can’t cope,
then escape I keenly plot

I cannot give up now
though many challenges I face
I cannot give up now
the pain grows stronger every day
I cannot give up now
because I’m closer yet than e’er before
I cannot give up the path,
I can bear suffering no more!

I regret all my bad actions
that have led me to this point
I can hardly fathom how
I caused such a fruitless plight
the minds I held divide and fraction
now with familiarity I fight
aeons of evil habits
will see their last midnight

I rely upon all beings
to train my mind to right
I rely upon all Buddhas
to correct my mistaken sight
I apply opponent action
best temporary relief
I make a sincere promise
to keep delusions brief

I cannot deny the karma
that has brought me to this place
I cannot ignore the causes
turning to virtue, my only grace
I cannot be separated
from my Holy Spiritual Guide
inseparably at my heart
my secret Divine Pride

Tags attachment, buddha, Buddhism, cause & effect, creative writing, distraction, karma, noise, peace, poem, Poetry, quiet, spiritual guide

Dreams Poetry

Elemental Insanity

I am of the earth

and I do not trust the water

It laps my shore
I lick it up, moistened
soft and damp
left yearning
unoiled lamp
left polished
but wanting wear

I’m earthen
–yet rarely feet have trodden here
while I walk the substrate bare-
footed, rare to see another
with the will to exhaust
such karma there–
upon my earth
travellers now fear
such dirt
and toxins leached have
run amuck
now gotten stuck
upon my shores
where you wish to lap me up

I do not trust
I will not harm the beings near
and you, my dear

I stretch my eye to the edge of
the horizon — trying to find where
water ends and sky begins
unaware I’m standing in
that ether now
my waist deep wading
transcends liminal space
and I no longer seek
to stretch my sightless senses far
but rather remain to feel
the space around

I look up and down and see that
in the sky, reflected back,
a different sea, a cloud
soaring condensation
ready to transform at any
moment, dark and massive
holding deceptive weight
threatening to rise the tides
and drown us all

I don’t trust the water

— — — — —

I am of the air

I do not trust the fire

I love it, though,
and how alluring
it dances and matches
my rhymic fancies
alighting neither
here nor there

like spark to ash
rising into the night
up to the stars –suddenly
dying, vanishing and descending
silently — crying and proclaiming
that life’s not fair

the fire burns me up
its heat draws me in
as if an answer
to the ice around my heart
as if it could possibly melt
lifetimes of anger
turned sorrow to rock
how I wished the fiery
heat-of-passion-
spawned aggression
was the answer
crystal clear —
yet the delusion’s not
so before I’m eaten up
I make like a deer
and run

I do not trust the fire

— — — — —

I am of the light

I do not trust the space
my depth perception’s off
my conception’s out of place
I do not trust the time
the way it moves so slow
to the uncomprehending mind
that dims my afterglow

I don’t like the space between us
as messages get lost, and
when you’re seeing me as separate
with problems you are fraught
I see emptiness before me
yet mistakenly, I know
naming ordinary appearance
where boundless magic grows

I do not like refraction
how it contaminates my rays
I am pure light
I feel it
yet space eliminates & constrains —
though I am the brilliant being

I don’t trust the space

— — — — —

I am of deep ignorance

or else I would escape
this elemental game —
this cyclical existence
in which I’m continuously betrayed
by each and all delusions
that gather round my head
and constrict my heart’s pace so
I can barely catch my breath
it’s time to let this go
into the water I will drown them
& with the current
let them flow

Tags air, creative writing, cycle, deception, earth, elements, fear, fire, illusion, light, poem, Poetry, reality, rebirth, refraction, samsara, space, water

Dreams Poetry

Possession

throat has seized
and body lusts,
reach out to grasp
man built to thrust

yet nothing there
for me to reach
and absent trust
rendered release

I cannot help
but ask and plead,
what dread clasp
robbed me of peace?

such a force came over me
I could not name
I could not tame
without remorse
my mind possessed
cut him down
to see him bled

III

a piece of mind
it held me back
so his murder
I did not commit
but the urge arose,
as I now recall,
to myself hard to admit
the need for me to train my mind
before I face the nearing times
when all are tested
most will fail
as they trained their minds
to no avail

Tags attachment, creative writing, delusion, demon, ignorance, karma, loss, mara, obstruction, pain, past, poem, Poetry, possession

Buddhism Poetry

The Unforgetting World

We live in the Unforgetting World

Unforgetting

You hear the word
you ask what it means

A man in a dress tells you it means
we never forget our attachments

What’s an attachment, you wonder
as your background in sales leads you to believe
it’s an item you attach to your primary sale
in essence, you should upsell three attachments
with each cell phone (case, cable, warranty)

There are no guarantees,
the man in the robes says
except that you won’t forget
your attachments

You learn:

Attachment is the mind that exaggerates
the positive qualities of an object
(attachment loves ignoring red flags)
attachment spins a deceitful fairy tale:
it claims the object is the source of your happiness

And we believe this tall tale
despite all contradicting evidence
we love to ignore evidence
when it does not corroborate our stories

You walk away

You begin to forget
what the wise man said
almost immediately

You think:

I am forgetting
I must live in the forgetting world
I have forgotten what I ate for breakfast
I have forgotten what I did yesterday
god only knows what I did last month

I only remember things I’ve labelled special
I only remember what I’ve done
in accordance with its repetition

When you ask me who I love,
I say friends and family
because they are familiar, and the answer
is engraved on our hearts over lifetimes, infinite

I have forgotten almost everything about my life
who I was, who I’ve been, the characters I’ve played
and the friends I used to have

All I have is the present
and if I think about what I can remember
at any given moment
it is my attachments

It seems it is the only thing
I can remember

Like some sick joke on our weak human minds
that a mental factor could purport such wicked lies
and how could we not remember that
we’ve fallen into such traps before!?
How can we keep forgetting
we are betrayed forevermore?

Until the cycle, the pattern ends
until disrupted, samsara bends
and finally breaks

You remember the man,
in the dress, in the robes
he gave you a liberating gift
an opportunity to see the truth

By seeing differently and remembering
I am ever unforgetting

The Unforgetting World (podcast)

Tags attachment, Buddhism, creative writing, ignorance, karma, poem, Poetry, reality, teacher, wisdom, wise man

Buddhism Poetry

Somewhere an Indestructible Heart

Post author By K. Samways
Post date June 11, 2023
1 Comment on Somewhere an Indestructible Heart

Often I find myself liking something
or labeling an experience as pleasant
for the enjoyment of making a kind
connection with another, a friend

We yearn for that connection
with another soul out there, out there
separate and halved like an apple, pear
fruit plucked unripe from the tree
while a love fell too soon
from her own broken branch —
will they rot together in the after?
They will rot in this life nonetheless

We strive for connection
by rearranging external circumstances
just so, so we can reach out
touch another, their heart, their skin
we yearn to touch another’s
separate skin, slick and spoiled, soft
so soft and external as smells and sounds
of summertime’s sadness, smooth as
Regina Spektor’s Russian indie blues

We say to our lonely, ignorant selves
it just couldn’t be my vast mind,
ocean-like and empty,
as all phenomena which appear
from this root mind, mixed with
all sentient beings, and Buddhas

Knowing this! while knowing this
and believing this, part-heartedly,
I gather the search party — a fellowship
on a journey to happiness — ever-forgetting
the story of the ring was this:

Goodness is in all men, all beings.

The ring — rather, the desire for the ring corrupted the hearts of men, and the hearts of other beings. In an attempt to attain this dark power, unthinkable negative actions were committed in unimaginable numbers which led to the destruction of peaceful existence, threatening to pitch everyone into the hellish suffering of Mordor’s merciless rule.

The protagonist’s goals never encompassed creating goodness — that already exists within all men. The goal was rather to overcome evil, to strive to be virtuous and honorable, to protect good at all costs. Because it is the right thing to do and yields the best results for other beings, beings we love.

The goal is to sacrifice the individual self that cannot attain happiness alone (and that will eventually steal happiness from others). The goal is to simply destroy the evil within.

When evil is destroyed, all that is left is good.

Knowing this! while knowing this
and believing this whole-heartedly
I change my external actions so
I cease grasping at the imagination
of my dreamlike reality and instead
create the internal causes to
evolve my mind completely,
to experience the truth directly
and to help all living beings in turn
completely inseparable from me
at my invincible heart

Tags appearance vs. reality, attachment, Buddhism, creative writing, dreamlike existence, emptiness, karma, love, mistaken reality, out there, poem, Poetry

Buddhism Photography Saturday Expressions

Words haven’t been invented yet | Session 14

Post author By K. Samways
Post date June 10, 2023
No Comments on Words haven’t been invented yet | Session 14

I sit
in what should be peace
I have a mostly happy mind and yet
not knowing how to feel
amongst constant mistaken discrimination
I stare longingly into the sky
cold press of flat rusted metal bars
under my calves
lukewarm Bengal Spice on my tongue
splashed on my knee
messy me

dark periwinkle birds, raptors
highlighted in pink and gold
dance and dive, painted as clouds
across the sky
part of me wants to cry
and that’s the seeds of delusions for you

because in reality
my mind is peaceful and content
and I have no problems

Oh! How I long for a problem!

so my mind searches and searches
and it detects a sadness that was only a seedling
and I tendered the seed of sadness until
now I could pluck at any time a flower
with each its own story of sorrow
and right now my mine is one of loneliness
the most stupid delusion of all because,
rooted in self-grasping ignorance,
it pushes me toward attachment along
a line of inappropriate attention
here now I’m hooked
on something I’ve never known, never seen
another unfulfilled desire has its evil hold on me
in another I cannot find, I can’t foresee
here I’m hooked
on suffering – making a terrifying joke
out of another precious lifetime

so while I sit and wish and wait
on Dharma I will meditate
knowing with blessings karma’s Fates
will be only kind
I dedicate my merit
feel sad, feel compassion
and with only bliss now cry

Tags attachment, Buddhism, compassion, contemplation, creative writing, delusion, desire, emptiness, furious 7, happiness, karma, loneliness, photograph, poem, Poetry, Saturday Expressions, sunset

Buddhism Poetry

Such Silly Suffering

Why do I feel so sad
to release my suffering?

I know its source! And still!
I cling like stickseed

burred burdens born
impossible to remove

without wisdom realizing
the true nature of all things

impermanent
not existing inherently

so what does that mean
when I cling so

to this suffering
inborn familiarity

infinite lifetimes old
makes 21 day habits

impossibly young
and still, we must

abide by these present
physical laws in order

to attain the higher
understandings and escape

of ultimate Enlightenment
for the benefit of

all living beings
the only way to make

any meaning of my
present suffering

Tags attachment, creative writing, enlightenment, enlightenmnet, escape, familiarity, karma, liberation, poem, Poetry, suffering, wisdom

Buddhism Philosophy Poetry

The Deserter’s Confession

Post author By K. Samways
Post date April 27, 2023
No Comments on The Deserter’s Confession

To desert – to leave someone, especially lacking

Desert – a dry place barren or lacking of water, and therefore life, typically characterized by sand or rocky substrate

Have I deserted others? I have been repenting for abandonment – all while running from those in need, in this very life.

I have grown attached to comfortable conditions and yet things are changing. Although I know the years bear varied fruits, I still expect a consistency inconsistent with samsara, and now I am frustrated and my wishes are unfulfilled!

What can I possibly do to bear the burdens and great sufferings of this life but go for refuge to the Three Jewels – the only glimmer of gold available to protect my mind until I reach full Enlightenment. I will always be vulnerable to the illusion-like elements, believing them to be inherently existent and external to my mind! Ha! A joke and a lie grasped at by a self-cherishing, ignorant mind.

Please, Buddha! Ripen a Dharma Jewel in my mind that I may no longer abide in such senseless suffering knowing that I create causes, I purify negativity, I grow merit in abundance, especially by remaining ever mindful and alert to the delusions that arise continuously in my mind, nonstop, as I breathe. To fight against this endless deluge, a magnificent current, is only possible through blessings (a miracle indeed)!

Praise to Buddha, the neverending source of happiness guiding all my steps, so that I may always keep a happy mind and so I might attain Enlightenment for the benefit of all living beings! How wonderful I have this precious opportunity. I will not take it for granted and I will not waste time wishing things would be easier or faster. What benefit is that to me when my primary goal is to end samsara permanently? I will be patient. I will wait quietly. I will not seek revenge. I will take responsibility for my negative karma. I will act as a Bodhisattva, now, in the present, even as I’m becoming one. I will bring the future result into the present which is simply happiness – for whatever arises is bliss and emptiness and we’ll wake up laughing, seeing it was here all along.

And after all, how far off can we really be?

All we have to do is give up grasping at this dream.

I will desert the dream.

I renounce samsara.

But I will not abandon living beings. I will come back to help all others. For my goal is not, nor ever, solitary peace.

No matter how much I think I may enjoy the quiet.

I will not live in the desert.